Learning How to Heal: Part One
I've had chronic pain just on my left side (which is also where the lesions were found) for around four years now. The pain has now spread all the way down my left leg to my foot and all the way up to my lower back. When the chronic pelvic pain began, I of course went to doctors. I was in pain all the time, and this was not normal for me. The first doctor I visited ran various tests, and of course everything came back normal. She did, however, send me to a specialist in women's health. This doctor then had more specific tests done (like ultrasounds) to see if they could find the cause of my chronic pain. Of course, those tests didn't reveal anything either. She recommended that I see a physical therapist. I did see a physical therapist for a couple of months, but I made no progress. So, I gave up seeing doctors for a few months in hopes that my pain would just go away since there was apparently nothing wrong with me. Well, it didn't. So once again, I went to see a doctor (a different one this time). She also ran a lot of various tests, this time including x-rays - with normal results, yet again. When she called me to tell me that everything was normal she said that she has no idea why I'm having chronic pain and asked ME to give HER a clue. Not what you want to hear from your doctor. I told her the only thing that made sense to me based on my years of severe period pain - maybe I have endometriosis. Well, she went with that. She sent me to an OBGYN. This doctor talked to me for a few minutes before agreeing that I could have endometriosis and prescribing me hormones.
Everyone has their own beliefs about medicine. I personally, since the time I was 13, held a strong dislike for prescription drugs. It's just something about it being unnatural and all of them causing side effects which makes me believe that it's actually hurting my body (which is the opposite of what I want to do). So I decided against taking them. Plus, I didn't want to take hormones without an actual diagnosis or I would be taking them just because.
I was right back where I began. No answers and still in pain. My pain was getting worse (it had now spread to my left hip). I was no longer able to hide the fact that I was in constant pain from others - if nothing else, because there were days when I just had to stay home (and still do!). A fellow chronic pain-sufferer at my church at the time recommended a doctor that she had seen that really took the time to listen to her and worked to find some solutions. I set up an appointment with her, and the visit went really well. She did listen to me and recommended that I see a urologist. After he examined me, he agreed that he thought that I had endometriosis. He said that the first line of treatment is usually hormones, but that he knew that I felt very strongly about getting an actual diagnosis. He then said that he knew a doctor in the area who specialized in pelvic pain and endometriosis, and that he thought she would feel the same way since she also specialized in laparoscopic surgery. I set up an appointment with her, and she also examined me and said that she agreed that I had endometriosis and that she agreed that it would be best to laparoscopically remove the lesions before starting treatment. Just to be sure that nothing had been missed in the previous ultrasound, she had me do another one. She also had me do a CT scan. The results came back normal for both of them. Nevertheless, my surgery was scheduled for June 2015 (when school was out). As expected, they were able to confirm a diagnosis of endometriosis with lesions in my left pelvic wall. I had a very painful recovery, but I was hopeful that the surgery would help my chronic pain. After receiving an actual verified diagnosis, I agreed to take the hormones to help my pain as well. Unfortunately, my pain was just as bad as ever - or perhaps even worse! So, I stopped taking the hormones because they were causing my blood pressure to be high (which it never previously was). When I followed up with the doctor who performed my surgery, she said that I should try physical therapy once again since maybe it would actually help now that the lesions were removed. I once again went to physical therapy for a couple of months and you guessed it...no progress.
I went back to my doctor and told her that the PT hadn't helped my pain. She then suggested that I take a SNRI (a.k.a. antidepressant) in the hopes that it would help my muscles relax and inhibit pain. I took it for a couple of months, but it did not help me with my pain and in fact made me feel even worse! I suffer from fatigue (which is a normal symptom of endometriosis). It's normally difficult for me to have the energy to do things, but this medication essentially disabled me. I had zero energy. I obviously weaned myself off of that medication. At my next visit, my doctor told me that she was leaving to work in another state, but recommended another doctor in her office. So, great. I had to start all over again with a different doctor. So my next visit was with the new doctor. She didn't listen to me and basically said that she thought my chronic pain was due to my endometriosis and that there was nothing that she could do for me. She did, however, send me to a physical medicine specialist to see if she could do something. That visit resulted in both an MRI that came back normal and also an EMG that came back normal. In the meantime, I was still in a lot of pain, so I decided to try physical therapy yet again but this time with one who specializes in chronic pelvic pain. After two months of treatment, I once again had no improvement in pain. So my therapist recommended that I see someone new to the same pain clinic that I had previously been going to. She wasn't a doctor - she was a nurse practitioner. But several of her patients had seen her recently and seemed to have good feedback. Having no improvement in my pain still, I decided to schedule an appointment with her. After examining me, she thought that doing numbing injections in my muscles might help. It was incredibly painful! That night when I went home I basically couldn't walk. She was curious what would happen if we tried it again, but this time added a couple of other muscles. The second time my leg didn't hurt as badly, but I was still pretty miserable. I can't say that they have helped me at all. My muscles still feel as tight as ever and, as far as I can tell, I'm still in the same amount of pain. She also wants me to see a chiropractor who does dry needling (similar to acupuncture). I never would've considered acupuncture if it wasn't for someone in the medical field who has seen results recommending it. At this point, I'm in chronic pain anyway, so what do I have to lose? I'm also going back to my current physical therapist next week to see if she can tell any improvement in my muscles after the numbing injections.
Anyway, that's where I am today with mainstream medicine. As you can tell, no doctor has found answers or solutions to my chronic left-sided pain. Needless to say, my journey so far has left me discouraged and nearly hopeless. That is why I have turned to alternative forms of healing. It hasn't been my first approach, but one that I have turned to in desperation.
In my next blog post, I will describe what I have been doing in terms of an "alternative" approach to healing.
Everyone has their own beliefs about medicine. I personally, since the time I was 13, held a strong dislike for prescription drugs. It's just something about it being unnatural and all of them causing side effects which makes me believe that it's actually hurting my body (which is the opposite of what I want to do). So I decided against taking them. Plus, I didn't want to take hormones without an actual diagnosis or I would be taking them just because.
I was right back where I began. No answers and still in pain. My pain was getting worse (it had now spread to my left hip). I was no longer able to hide the fact that I was in constant pain from others - if nothing else, because there were days when I just had to stay home (and still do!). A fellow chronic pain-sufferer at my church at the time recommended a doctor that she had seen that really took the time to listen to her and worked to find some solutions. I set up an appointment with her, and the visit went really well. She did listen to me and recommended that I see a urologist. After he examined me, he agreed that he thought that I had endometriosis. He said that the first line of treatment is usually hormones, but that he knew that I felt very strongly about getting an actual diagnosis. He then said that he knew a doctor in the area who specialized in pelvic pain and endometriosis, and that he thought she would feel the same way since she also specialized in laparoscopic surgery. I set up an appointment with her, and she also examined me and said that she agreed that I had endometriosis and that she agreed that it would be best to laparoscopically remove the lesions before starting treatment. Just to be sure that nothing had been missed in the previous ultrasound, she had me do another one. She also had me do a CT scan. The results came back normal for both of them. Nevertheless, my surgery was scheduled for June 2015 (when school was out). As expected, they were able to confirm a diagnosis of endometriosis with lesions in my left pelvic wall. I had a very painful recovery, but I was hopeful that the surgery would help my chronic pain. After receiving an actual verified diagnosis, I agreed to take the hormones to help my pain as well. Unfortunately, my pain was just as bad as ever - or perhaps even worse! So, I stopped taking the hormones because they were causing my blood pressure to be high (which it never previously was). When I followed up with the doctor who performed my surgery, she said that I should try physical therapy once again since maybe it would actually help now that the lesions were removed. I once again went to physical therapy for a couple of months and you guessed it...no progress.
I went back to my doctor and told her that the PT hadn't helped my pain. She then suggested that I take a SNRI (a.k.a. antidepressant) in the hopes that it would help my muscles relax and inhibit pain. I took it for a couple of months, but it did not help me with my pain and in fact made me feel even worse! I suffer from fatigue (which is a normal symptom of endometriosis). It's normally difficult for me to have the energy to do things, but this medication essentially disabled me. I had zero energy. I obviously weaned myself off of that medication. At my next visit, my doctor told me that she was leaving to work in another state, but recommended another doctor in her office. So, great. I had to start all over again with a different doctor. So my next visit was with the new doctor. She didn't listen to me and basically said that she thought my chronic pain was due to my endometriosis and that there was nothing that she could do for me. She did, however, send me to a physical medicine specialist to see if she could do something. That visit resulted in both an MRI that came back normal and also an EMG that came back normal. In the meantime, I was still in a lot of pain, so I decided to try physical therapy yet again but this time with one who specializes in chronic pelvic pain. After two months of treatment, I once again had no improvement in pain. So my therapist recommended that I see someone new to the same pain clinic that I had previously been going to. She wasn't a doctor - she was a nurse practitioner. But several of her patients had seen her recently and seemed to have good feedback. Having no improvement in my pain still, I decided to schedule an appointment with her. After examining me, she thought that doing numbing injections in my muscles might help. It was incredibly painful! That night when I went home I basically couldn't walk. She was curious what would happen if we tried it again, but this time added a couple of other muscles. The second time my leg didn't hurt as badly, but I was still pretty miserable. I can't say that they have helped me at all. My muscles still feel as tight as ever and, as far as I can tell, I'm still in the same amount of pain. She also wants me to see a chiropractor who does dry needling (similar to acupuncture). I never would've considered acupuncture if it wasn't for someone in the medical field who has seen results recommending it. At this point, I'm in chronic pain anyway, so what do I have to lose? I'm also going back to my current physical therapist next week to see if she can tell any improvement in my muscles after the numbing injections.
Anyway, that's where I am today with mainstream medicine. As you can tell, no doctor has found answers or solutions to my chronic left-sided pain. Needless to say, my journey so far has left me discouraged and nearly hopeless. That is why I have turned to alternative forms of healing. It hasn't been my first approach, but one that I have turned to in desperation.
In my next blog post, I will describe what I have been doing in terms of an "alternative" approach to healing.
What they found when they did my laparoscopy in June 2015.
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